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But I had an intense recurring fantasy of tying up the little girl next door naked and causing her to fall down in the snow.

This caused me a great deal of shame and perplexity.

As best I can tell I was born (I'm a man) with the deeply ingrained orientation of sexually dominant heterosexual. One of my earliest memories, circa age 4, involved the busy work of coloring a picture in Sunday school.

The starting point pic was the usual simple black lines on white paper - a little girl in a dress.

Foolish enough to show my morning's work to my parents (I should have had the brains to misplace that one) I was in trepidation they would wonder why I was rendering this sweet little innocent in, what I later came to understand was, "bondage" (it would be years until I learned that word).

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