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This month Jane magazine is sponsoring a contest to get a 29-year-old virgin laid, a cheap publicity stunt that misses the bigger point: Why does a “funny, gorgeous” virgin need to place what is essentially an ad for sex at all?There was time when virginity was a prize, a treasure to be guarded and a badge of honor, but now, it seems that for the modern career woman virginity is nothing but a curse.One night they were at his house, making out on the couch, when he asked her, “When’s the last time you had sex? She didn’t know how to answer, and she didn’t really want to. It was like, ‘Oh my God, they’re all going to do this,'” she says.
“No offense, but most people do that in high school,” he told her.
She still tried, occasionally, and after about a year she met another guy, someone else from work.
“If you must date a virgin, keep in mind” that in his opinion, “as soon as you invade her space so to speak, her emotions will intensify.
She will exact certain expectations on you, whether you know it or not.” He goes on, “An obese thirty-something career woman virgin, for example, is not on the same level as a naäve [sic] 18-year-old virgin with a strict background who has never dated before,” reinforcing the stereotype that there’s something physically or psychologically wrong with a woman who is 30-something and still a virgin.
“The culture is getting more and more permission to be sexual at any age,” says Shirley Zussman, a sex therapist in New York.